Tuesday 12 March 2013

Brandi Passante was wrong on this one

Brandi Passante was wrong on this one




Brandi and Jarrod are a couple. They star in Storage Wars. When buying lockers, they often argue. Brandi is always criticising Jarrod. She calls him names and criticises the lockers he buys and how much he pays for them. She is always nagging him. It seemed to go on forever. Jarrod was getting a little sick of it. It was not just at work, but they were a couple, so he had to hear it all the time at home as well. One day, Jarrod purchased a locker. As per usual, Brandi said it was bunch of junk and he paid too much for it. Jarrod was sure that the locker would make a profit. Brandi said that their was no way.



“Brandi, don’t worry, I guarantee you we will make money on this.” “Jarrod, there is no way.” “I tell you what, do you want to make a bet?” “Yeah ok, I know that we are going to lose either way,” Brandi said. “Ok then, if you are so sure, how about if the locker makes a profit I get to pour leftovers all over you. If it doesn’t you can do it to me,” Jarrod said. “You are crazy, but you know what, if you want to risk it fine. Messing you up will be some consolation when we lose money on this locker,” Brandi said. “Just don’t be too upset when you lose and I get to embarrass you in front of everyone,” Brandi said.



Brandi was very confident. She always felt that she knew best. Although she was right a lot of the time, she was not right all of the time. This time it really mattered. This was all going to be filmed for the show. The other buyers would be watching including Barry, Dave Hester and Darrell Sheets. Getting messed up and losing would be a lot more embarrassing for Jarrod in this situation, because of everyone who was watching. Also Brandi really liked to emasculate him any time she could. She tried to wear the pants in the relationship. She could be very moody and very bossy. When she got into a strop it was no good for anyone. He knew that if she lost she would be pissed off, but she was always pissed off about something anyway so he was beyond caring at this point. It would be well worth it.



Jarrod had paid $800 for this storage locker. It was time to look through and see what they had. Right off the bat they found some furniture. It was worth at least $300. They found some household items that were worth about $250. They then found an antique cane that was found to be worth $150.They were up to $700 now. There was one more box left, it would come down to this. What would be inside? They were both feeling very nervous at this point. Jarrod took the box and brought it out. This was the moment of truth. He opened the box, as Brandi crowded him. In the box was scuba diving gear. It would be worth at least $300. “Yes,” Jarrod said. Brandi looked at him embarrassingly. She blushed and licked her lips. “Hey, Brandi, remember a little bet that we had?,” he teased. “A bet, I can’t really recall. I don’t know what you mean,” she returned. “Well, we have the chair all ready for you Brandi. Maybe you should go over and have a seat, get comfortable,” he teased. Brandi shook her head and glared at him as she walked over.



In her heart she knew that she deserved this. She was always giving Jarrod a hard time. Now she was going to pay the price. She reluctantly walked over to the plastic chair that was sat out in the middle of the storage centre. She sat down. She was wearing a shoulder less orange and green dress, she would wear this type of thing quite often. It showed off her large breasts. She shook her head and licked her lips. The other buyers and auctioneers came out now to watch this happen to Brandi. They all came in pointing and laughing at her. She pointed at them and scowled,” Don’t you dare even say a word,” she said. The messy buckets were now brought out for her. Everyone clapped and whistled. “I am going to get you back for this. That is a promise,” she said, threatening Jarrod. Jarrod smiled and laughed. This was going to be cathartic for him for sure. Brandi took a deep breath. She knew that whatever she tried to do,. She would not put Jarrod off doing this.



It was finally time for Brandi to receive her comeuppance. Jarrod walked over and took the first bucket into his hands. He smiled and looked at his wife with a wide mischievous grin. He chuckled. She looked back at him. “You bastard, you will regret this,” she said. He walked behind her carrying the heavy bucket in his hands. She closed her eyes, scrunching up her face. Jarrod looked up and smiled at his cheering colleagues and rivals. He then looked down at his partner. He enjoyed this moment. It was a moment he would remember forever. He was going to love this. The bucket was filled with mashed potatoes and gravy. It was very heavy and sludgy. He aimed it on Brandi’s head and tipped it over onto her. It was very slow to emerge from the bucket. Some of the gravy fell out first, dribbling onto the top of Brandi’s head and down her blonde hair. He had to push the bucket down onto the top of her head as if it was a hat. He had to push hard to loose the gloppy mashed potatoes from the bucket. As he pushed, some began to tumble out down her face and onto her large protruding breasts. The potatoes were thick and stodgy. Brandi made a gagging face and everyone cheered as the blobs of the mash fell down on her. Most of it was soaked in thick lumpy brown gravy. The gravy poured down Brandi’s nose and soaked the top of her dress and shoulders. The men in the crowd cheered and wolf whistled.



Jarrod next took a bucket filled with strawberry jam. It was red and sloshy. He lifted it over Brandi and started pouring onto her. The blobs of jam fell down over her face and down her body. Some of the blobs rolled down her while others stuck in places. Jam stuck to her forehead and cheeks. Some hung from her nose across her mouth. A blobs stick to the top of her head. Bits of strawberry and seeds were plastered to her shoulders and her arms.



He quickly picked up the next bucket. It was filled with oatmeal. It was much sloppier than what had gone before. Brandi laughed and shook her head in disbelief. Jarrod quickly started to dump the disgusting slop over his partner. It was a disgusting grayish yellowy colour. Brandi stuck her tongue out as the glop fell onto her head. She closed her eyes and soon her entire head disappeared under a torrent of thick oatmeal. All she could do was close her eyes. Her entire face was covered. She could hear people commenting. They were saying things like, “Oh my god, look at that,” and “Ick, that looks disgusting”. The oatmeal seemed to pour for ages. It poured down her neck and back as well as over her shoulders and all over her breasts. Her dress was getting heavy now. She could feel the oatmeal weighing it down. She had to be careful because she was not wearing a bra. Already her breasts were on the verge of popping out for the whole world to see. She quickly took her arm and firmly crossed it across her chest. She clutched at her dress, in a desperate attempt to keep it up. She shook her oatmeal covered head. Jarrod looked down and laughed. Brandi’s hair was soaked in oatmeal. “Looking good Brandi,” Jarrod teased. She glared up at him.



Brandi knew that her clothes could not take much more of this, but she also knew that there were more buckets for her. She was very annoyed now. Jarrod now had the next bucket ready. It was gigantic and filled with baked beans. He held it over her. He waited a second though. He did not pour right away. She did not get it when she expected. He waited until she let her guard down. The second that she did, he then started to pour the baked beans on her. They fell onto her face. Because she was looking up at the time, her mouth was open slightly. The result was, she ended up with a mouth full of baked beans. She flung her head forward, spitting a mouthful of the vile baked beans out. This also made her let her guard down. At the same instant her arm came away from her dress. The beans were now pouring quicker than before. Her body flung forward and the top part of her dress fell downward, overwhelmed by the beans. Her breasts were fully visible for all to see, although the beans that now were all over them obscured them slightly. She slipped and slid and struggled to cover herself in the still falling beans. She tried to pull her dress up, but this was not working and only caused her boobs to be thrust forward even more. She was falling all over herself everywhere, much to the delight of those watching. She couldn’t really see what she was doing because there was beans and oatmeal everywhere. She comically trashed around in the messy with her arms and legs. She looked as though she was trying to swim. She was a total laughing stock now. People were doubled over in laughter watching her struggle in the mess. She almost fell from her seat.



Unfortunately for Brandi, Jarrod now had a bucket of creamed corn. He began to dump it on her. She had no chance of holding her dress up now. Thick yellow creamed corn was pouring down on her. She continued to wiggle and fidget. In the end, she had to give up and just let the creamed corn get her. She shrugged her shoulders as she was slopped with the creamed corn. The top of her dress fell down completely as she was covered in thick yellow sloppy creamed corn. She gagged. The creamed corn covered her face. Bits of corn fell from her hair and nose. “I can’t believe this,” she said. Though her words were muffled with creamed corn.



Jarrod then grabbed the last bucket. It was filled with coleslaw. It was slimy and disgusting. It smelled awful. It looked as though it must have been rancid. Jarrod held it out in front of Brandi’s face. She stuck out her tongue and visibly gagged when she smelled it. “All for you,” Dave said. “Want some slaw with that,” Barry said. “He is going to get the cold shoulder tonight,” Darrell said. Brandi glared at them. She resisted the urge to scream. She did not enjoy being publicly humiliated like this. She knew that this would be on television as well. They might blur out her breasts, but everyone she knew was going to be watching it. She was now about to get slawed. Jarrod took the bucket. I looked up at the crowd and gave a cheeky smile. He laughed as he turned the bucket over on Brandi’s head. Everyone gasped as the disgusting, foul smelled, gone off coleslaw plopped down onto Brandi’s head. The top of her head was instantly covered in coleslaw. It began to drip down her face. She looked up and gave a sardonic look. She laughed sarcastically. “Ha, ha, ha, very funny. This is a riot,” she said. She gave a sickened look, sticking her tongue out of the side of her mouth. Coleslaw covered her cheeks and nose. It totally stunk. More fell onto her breasts and thighs. She used both hands and ran them through the pile of coleslaw and other assorted mess that had collected on her lap. She pushed it off as best she could. Jarrod pumped his fist and took a bow. Everyone else applauded and cheered.



Brandi looked at them with an angry expression. She tried throwing handfuls of coleslaw at them, but she was too far away. She stood up and looked angrily at Jarrod. She had already managed to pull her top up and hold it in place with her hand. She stomped off to the bathroom still covered in coleslaw, clutching her chest. She shook her fist at Jarrod and stomped off to the bathroom. Everyone continued laughing at her.





1 comment:

  1. Do you know who are Brandi Passante and Jarrod Schulz? You might recognize them from the popular show Storage Wars. They also appeared in the spinoff show titled “Brandi & Jarrod: Married to the Job”. The pair is not married to each other but they are life partners.

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