Tuesday 31 May 2011

Ashlee vs. Jessica Simpson Results

Ashlee vs. Jessica Simpson Results




“Today we have a serious case of sibling rivalry on our show. We have two sisters who have been in competition with each other their whole lives. Today will not be any different. Only today, there is a lot more than bragging right at stake for these two. The winner is going to have the pleasure of pouring mess all over their sibling with half of the country watching. This is a moment that they have been waiting for their entire lives,” Mr. G. said to open the show. “It will be quite interesting to see how the public will have voted on this one. It was a tough decision for anyone to make I am sure. It will be get quite embarrassing tonight I am sure. So, can we welcome our feuding family. Ashlee and Jessica Simpson.



Ashlee and Jessica came out smiling each on either side of the stage. Both had their hair in pony tails. Both wore sweat shirts that were cut off and pulled down one shoulder. Ashlee’s was red, Jessica’s was grey. Both wore cut off jean shorts. They each took their places side by side with Mr. G. in the middle. The crowd cheered them. They could not wait to see what was going to happen that night.



“The Simpsons Sisters everyone,” Mr. G. said,” You could cut the tension in the studio with a knife. Someone is going to be getting their own back on their sibling tonight. It is going to be a night that no one in their family will ever forget. Someone is going to pay the price. So Ashlee what are your feelings about tonight?”



“I am going to love every minute of tonight. I have wanted to do this for years and now I might get my chance. I am always the one who comes second in everything. It is time that Jessica gets taken down a notch or two. I always get dumped on and I think that it should be her turn for once.,” Ashlee said. “How do you reply Jessica?,” Mr. G. asked. “ I don’t know why she is so sure she is going to win. She might get the most votes anyway. I don’t know what she is so mad about anyway. All of what she felt is not my issue anyway,” said Jessica. Jessica was completely oblivious to how her sister really felt about herself and their relationship. She did not really understand how the voting worked anyway and figured that she had more fans than her sister so she would probably be the one being saved. Ashlee just wanted to get her sister so much that she never let the idea that she might lose into her mind.



“So everyone, should we get on to our results?,” Mr. G. asked. The crowd roared their approval. Ashlee and Jess then went all serious. They looked at the ground and concentrated. “Here we go,” Mr. G. said,” The moment we have all been waiting for. The sister with the most votes, receiving 62% of the votes from the public is… Jessica!” Jessica’s face did not move much. She really did not have a clue what she was in for. Ashlee screamed Yes at the top of her lungs. She danced and jumped up and down. She could not contain how happy she felt. “I won, I won,” she said. “I’d like to thank everyone who did not vote for me. Thank you so, so much for giving me this moment. I am going to enjoy this so much. It is going to be the highlight of my year. I am going to get to slime my sister. I have wanted to do this ever since I was a little girl. I just love it. After all of the years of being second best, being treated number two to my big sister I now get to have some payback and I am promise you I am going to love every minute of this.”



“Jessica, you got the most votes so now Ashlee is going to get mess you up. Do you have any last words or thoughts for us,” Mr. G. asked. “This is going to be disgusting isn’t it? I don’t know what to say. I am in shock. I never thought that I would actually lose to Ashlee at something.,” Jessica said. “Just get sit your ass in the hot seat,” Ashlee said. Jessica slowly made and reluctantly made her way to the chair and took her seat. The messy trolley was then wheeled out. Ashlee rubbed her hands together and gave an evil laugh as she looked at the trolley.



“Today we have a special theme to the mess,” Mr. G. said,” We are going to relive some moments from Jessica’s past. The items that we have are in line with that theme. Ok, here we go. Jessica you may remember that once you famously were eating Chicken of the sea and you did not know whether you were eating chicken or fish. Well, today we happen to have a very large amount of Chicken of the sea tuna fish. We think we have a way to ensure that you will never forget if it is chicken or fish again. I assure you Jessica is tuna and it is definitely fish.” Jessica’s eyes widened as she realized what was about to happen. Ashlee grabbed the bucket of disgusting tuna fish. She laughed as she walked over to Jessica. She stood behind her sister. “Is this chicken or fish what I have here,” she said, mocking Jessica. “Oh my god,” Jessica said. Jessica could not have prepared for how revolting the slop actually was. Ashlee lifted the bucket then slowly tipped the tuna on her. It was brown and smelled disgusting. A large lump initially fell out straight onto the top of Jessica’s head. She gagged as it plopped onto her head. Ashlee laughed as she poured more onto Jessica, some landing on her lap and on her legs. Jessica closed her eyes and made a disgusted face. The disgusting tuna fish looked really interesting all over the beautiful girl sitting in the seat. Jessica took handfuls of the tuna and smushed it around. More tuna plopped onto her in giant lumps. Jessica could not believe the odour from the tuna. Ashlee took one of the lumps of tuna in her hand. “It’s fish,” she said to Jessica and then rubbed the handful of tuna around in Jessica’s face. She raised her arms in victory. “By the way Jessica,” Mr. G. said ,”Tuna is fish.” “I got it,” she said sarcastically.



“I would like to take you back again if I may,” Mr. G. said, “ Another famous quote from Jessica if you remember was a time when you believed that buffalo wings were made from buffalo. Well today we will give you a little reminder that buffalo wings are made from chicken. Now wing sauce is too hot and spicy to pour on anyone, but as we know, there is something that tends to go hand in hand with buffalo wings and that is celery and bleu cheese. So today we have some bleu cheese dressing for Jessica. When you are ready Ashlee, let her have it.”



Ashlee took the bucket of bleu cheese dressing over to Jessica. “Bleu cheese and tuna fish. Sounds like a good combination to me. Buffalo wings are not made from buffalo by the way. Buffalo do not have wings,” Ashlee said. Jessica did not try to argue she just closed her eyes and braced herself for what was going to happen. She moaned as the thick gloppy bleu cheese salad dressing was poured down onto her. It poured straight onto her face, down her nose and chin then onto her cheeks. It covered the top of her head and fell onto her shoulders down over and into her sweatshirt onto her bra. Then down her front onto her lap and shorts. The dressing was thick and white and very cold. It smelled just as bad as the tuna did. Jessica gagged and screamed. She tried to clear her eyes and face. She was almost unrecognizable apart from her teeth when she smiled.



“Ok Jessica. We are almost finished with our little trip down memory lane. Finally, another famous quote you made was when you said You love my stinky ass. You are also known for, how do we put this, letting rip at the wrong moments.” The crowd found this hilarious and started laughing and commenting. “ You have never seemed embarrassed about this, but your flatulence is famous. So, as such we thought we would give you something to go along with this theme. We have a very large amount of baked beans. We figured you would enjoy them as then are also famous for certain properties.” “Wow, this is embarrassing,” Jessica said.



Ashlee took the bucket of baked beans. “We love your stinky ass.,” she told her sister. The crowd chanted beans, beans, beans. Ashlee danced around with the bucket. She lifted it held it for a second and then dumped. Jessica looked up as Ashlee poured. The baked beans showered down on Jessica Simpson. Ashlee took her time dumping the beans over Jessica’s head then up her legs, onto her lap and then down her neck and all over her chest. The red from the beans mixed with the white bleu cheese. It also made the beans stick all over Jessica. Jessica tried to clear as much off as she could. Ashlee just celebrated.



“Well, Jessica was a good sport. I think Ashlee may have just done what a lot of Jessica’s ex boyfriends would love to get a chance to do. How are you feeling Jessica,” Mr. G. asked. “Messy! Pretty embarrassed. What can I say. I know Ashlee enjoyed that. It stinks that’s for sure. It was pretty gross,” Jessica replied. “How bout you Ashlee,” Mr. G. asked. “That may have been the best moment of my life. I love my sister but I have had to put up with a lot from her in my life. She really deserved it. I got to get some payback on her. I feel great.”



Jessica allowed herself to be photographed. She gave Ashlee a big hug as the posed for pictures. Ashlee would have one of the photos enlarged and framed. She had it hung on the wall in her house. The picture was of herself and her sister. Her completely clean and Jessica covered in mess from head to toe. She would never let Jessica forget. She also sent copies of the show to her parents and all of Jessica’s friends.

1 comment:

  1. Could you do a follow up story with Jessica finally getting revenge on mega brat Ashlee, who Jessica feels has always gotten away with getting messy? With Ashlee being disgusted beyond belief?

    ReplyDelete